I just went to Lowe's to get a Christmas tree...
I didn't leave with a tree. When you take into account the size of my car and the size of a Christmas tree, and multiply it by my lack of my dad's engineering know-how, raise that to the power of me being by myself, not having a rope, and the Christmas tree department being understaffed, this is what you get...
tiny car+5' Christmas tree x lack of engineering knowledge^being alone x no way to attach tree to car x lack of staffing=
I left with a bird bath and this video...
Most of the store was laughing, maybe at the dancing toys, maybe at me... I didn't hang around to find out...
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